"We want to bring the God whom we worship, His beauty, his sovereignty, His order, into the very texture of our life..."
("Abba" by Evelyn Underhill, p.167)
"To the alarming list of innate vices which you have managed to get together I Shd [sic] like to add another: Pride.
All this preoccupation with your own imperfection is not humility, but an insidious form of spiritual pride!"
("The Making of a Mystic", by Carol Poston, p. 146)
So, I have to admit that I fear looking ridiculous in front of others, I suppose it is a part of my personality and when I read about someone else struggling with self deprecation, I quickly identify with them. Sometimes it is much easier to point out my own issues before others can do so, or maybe the self deprecation is a hope that others might see and verbalize something better than what I believe about myself. But let's be honest, neither is fit for the Kingdom of God. The Kingdom of God is not about me, and when I'm focused on me then their is a great need to get beyond my imperfection and have a departure from my "self". Underhill points out that this type of thinking is not humility, but a form of spiritual pride, the kind that focuses on the faults that keeps one from growing in maturity and embracing the inheritance that Christ is offering His children. Some of us have these tendencies, so how can we move toward self departure?
"Never allow yourself to be pessimistic about your own state. Look outwards instead of inwards: & when you are
inclined to be depressed & think you are getting on badly, make an act of Thanksgiving instead..."
("The Making of a Mystic", by Carol Poston, p. 147)
I love this! The answer to moving away from self deprecation is the act of Thanksgiving. It is impossible to be both critical of self and maintain a disposition of gratitude at the same time. Gratitude forces us to look outwardly and get away from our self focus. Underhill reminds us of the focus of the believer in Christ...
"The object of your salvation is God's Glory, not your happiness...Merge yourself in the great life of the Christian family".
("The Making of a Mystic", by Carol Poston, p. 147)
Self centeredness has no place in the Kingdom of God. It doesn't honor God as Redeemer and it doesn't bear the marks of salvation in Christ. Be thankful and in doing so, we will find ourselves concerned with charity toward the world, being fully present with the church and ultimately glorifying God. How are you doing with your own self departure?
Acts of Thanksgiving:
1) Spend some time reading Psalm 136 or Psalm 95 and list things for which the Psalmist is thankful. Slowly pray through each one and express your gratitude to God.
2) Make a "T" chart and on one side list things you are generally thankful for and on the other side list why you are thankful to God for these things.
3) Write a letter of gratitude to 3 significant people in your life. Tell them why they have impacted you.